b3 b0rn.. c0nf0rm, b3 si|3nt .. di3

that was the comment i received from an old skoolmate when i called her for the umpteenth time to ask whether she’s free on a certain saturday.

memang aku kemaruk.

here’s the thing…. ever since i had kakak, i’ve turned into a homebody. when a chance invitation goes my way to go out and spend time with friends - and it does not include the kids and hubby - my guilt goes into overdrive.

movie outings… company sports club activities … charity drives… annual dinners.. sometimes even wedding receptions (esp those kat hotels/posh places where kids rarely allowed!). u name it – i’ve excused myself from it.

partly from me feeling guilty of leaving my kids (yet) at me parents’ or with amir – and mostly feeling guilty that i’ve turned down invitations all this while, getting back into the scene seems a bit lame and awkward.

amir has highlighted quite a few times over the years – why do i rarely go out with my friends? – the first spontaneous thought that goes thru my mind – what friends?? … i think i’ve managed to alienate so many over the years that it’s a blessing that some still know i exist.

heh.

hence, this year – another resolution would be to make a point to make contact with circles outside family and work … dah ler aku nye family and work nie minimal overlap with my friends (esp those from high school)

so if u guys suddenly get a call from me out of the blue – no, i am not into network marketing or unit trusts – that’s just me – kemaruk nak jumpa member!